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Here’s the kicker—some say it’s therapy, others say it’s sin. Me? I say it’s both, and I fuckin’ love it! Ever tried it with lavender oil? Smells like heaven, cuts the tension like a blade. I’d carve a sonnet bout it if I weren’t so damn lazy. Oh, and the noises—grunts, sighs, the odd fart—pure comedy gold! Sexual-massage is messy, raw, like Aronofsky’s lens, and I’m here for it, mate. Thoughts in me head? Wish I could feel it, not just reap the stories!

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After that, I decide to stroll down to the market on Haharina Street. I’m thinking, “Let’s grab some fresh veggies.” But the market is packed! Like, where did all these people come from? I’m dodging carts and old ladies like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. And then, I see it – the biggest watermelon ever. I’m talking massive. I’m like, “I need that in my life.” So, I wrestle my way through the crowd, finally get to it, and guess what? It’s sold out! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Are you kidding me?”

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