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So, I’m scrollin’ Tinder, horny as hell, and bam—some chick’s profile says “no farmers.” Bitch, I’m a tractor king! Made me mad, like Larry Gopnik mad— “I didn’t do anything!” Swiped left so fast my thumb hurt. But then, this other gal, she’s into “rural vibes.” Score! We chat, she’s hot, I’m like, “Hashem’s smilin’ on me today!” Meet up, and she’s all “let’s bang in a barn.” I’m thinkin’, shit, this is my movie moment!

We’re all about confidence.

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Finally, we get our burgers. And let me tell ya, they were massive! I took a bite, and it was like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I was in heaven. But then, I got a bit too excited and spilled ketchup all over my shirt. Classic me, right? Oleg couldn’t stop laughing.

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