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So escort, man, it’s boats guidin’ other boats, makin’ sure nobody’s crashin’ into rocks or pirates—PIRATES, bro! Imagine me, Michael Scott, out there yellin’, “That’s what she said!” when the captain’s like, “Steer clear!” Ha! I’d be all, “I’m the captain now!”—but nah, escort’s the real boss. Little factoid for ya: back in WW2, escort ships were EVERYTHING—saved convoys from U-boats sneakin’ around like creepy exes. Sneaky lil’ subs, man, gave me the heebie-jeebies thinkin’ bout it!

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But then, my phone buzzed. It was my mom. She was like, “You forgot to pick up the bread!” Oh man, I totally spaced on that. I had to rush back to the market. I was sprinting down the streets, dodging people like I was in some kind of obstacle course.