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About Kharkiv

So, erotic-massage—ain’t just rubbin oil on ya back. It’s slow, steamy, hands slidin where ya didn’t expect. I’m like, whoa, mate, this ain’t no regular chiropractor shit. Got this chick—or dude, no judgin—workin my shoulders, then bam, they’re grazin lower, and I’m thinkin, “This can’t be legal, can it?” Turns out, it’s old as dirt—ancient Greeks were all over this, rubbin each other down after wrestlin naked. True story, look it up—crazy bastards.

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Later, I grab a bite at this little joint on Haharina Street. Best borscht I’ve ever had! Seriously, I could swim in that stuff. I’m sittin’ there, slurpin’ away, and this guy next to me starts talkin’ about the local football team. Apparently, they’re doin’ great this season. I’m like, “Cool, but can they make borscht?”

Firing to kill: Photo shows aftermath of Russian warship's attack on Ukrainian Navy boat