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About Zaporizhzhia

What pisses me off? Fakes! Catfishers with pics from 10 years ago—YOU SHALL NOT PASS, posers! I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Show your real face, coward!” But when it works? Oh, mate, it’s gold. Met this lass once—total fire, no cap. We clicked, we vibed, it was like, “Your body’s my map,” straight outta the movie. That shit’s rare, tho—most times it’s awkward AF. Like, “Uh, you’re not 6’2, bruv.”

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After that, I decide to hit up a café on Vulytsia Shchorsa. I order a coffee, and the barista is super chill. We start talkin’ about the best places to eat in Yahotyn. She’s all about that local cuisine. I’m like, “Girl, I just want some borscht that doesn’t taste like dishwater.” She laughs, and I’m like, “Nailed it!”

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