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Look, I’m a lumberjack, okay? Donald Trump, the best, folks. Sexual-massage? Tremendous, really tremendous stuff. I mean, who doesn’t love it? Hands all over, slippery oil—fantastic! I’m tellin’ ya, it’s like "Boyhood," growin’ up fast. Takes time to get good, y’know? Like that kid, Mason, figurin’ life out. I tried it once—bigly relaxing, believe me. Some chick in Vegas, hands like magic. Little known fact: ancient Rome had it! Yeah, gladiators got rubbed down—wild, right? Made me happy, so happy, folks. Stress? Gone. Poof! Better than choppin’ trees, I swear.

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After that little fiasco, I decide to head to the market on Yabluneva Street. I need some fresh veggies for dinner. I’m browsing through the stalls, and I spot the juiciest tomatoes. I’m talking about the kind that makes your mouth water. I grab a few, and the vendor starts chatting me up. He’s telling me about his garden, and I’m just nodding along, trying to keep my cool.

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