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Oh, and the profiles—hilarious! “Lookin’ for my soulmate”—yeah, on a sex app? Sure, Jan. Cracks me up every time. Exaggeratin’ for effect here, but some folks treat it like a porno audition. “Must be 6’5” and rich”—good luck, sister! I’m over here thinkin’, “Scoob, just find a pal who likes treats.”
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While I’m slurpin’ away, I overhear this couple arguing. I mean, come on, it’s a café, not a boxing ring! The dude’s all like, “You never listen!” and she’s like, “Well, you never talk!” I’m sittin’ there, tryin’ not to laugh. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I’d rather wrestle a bear than deal with that drama.”
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