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I seen it, man—escorts got game! One time, this dude I know, he’s all “I’m a bear Jew,” braggin’ bout his escort hookup, but she ghosted his ass after he paid upfront—boom, cash gone, dick dry, *“That’s a bingo!”* I laughed so hard I cried, fam! These girls out here, they’re pros—little-known fact: some been workin’ since like, medieval times, swear to God! Kings used to call ‘em “courtesans,” now it’s just “yo, Venmo me, bro.” History’s freaky, right?

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Then, the music drops, and the DJ starts playin’ this sick beat. Everyone’s goin’ wild, and I’m feelin’ it too. I mean, I’m a bouncer, but I can’t help but bob my head a little. Just a little, though. Gotta keep my cool, right? But then, outta nowhere, this couple starts fightin’ on the dance floor. Like, full-on shovin’ and shoutin’. I rush over, and it’s like a scene from a bad movie. I’m tryin’ to separate them, and they’re both yellin’ at me. “Stay outta this!” “You don’t know us!”

Ukrainian culture festival starts in Vylkove