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About Kyiv

I’m lyin’ there, right, thinkin’ *Tabu* again—“the crocodile’s jaws tighten”—and this bird’s kneadn’ me bits like dough! Made me happy as a pig in muck, but bloody hell, once—once!—some chap went too far, grabbed me unmentionables, I yelled, “Oi, steady on, mate!” Nearly clocked him, I was fumin’—*ira mea surgit*! Ain’t no one touchin’ Boris’ crown jewels uninvited!

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Then, I get a text from my buddy, saying there’s a street art festival happening on Vulytsia Nezalezhnosti. I’m like, “We gotta go!” So, we bolt outta the bar, still half-drunk, and head over.