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I was pokin’ around, thinkin’—what’s the deal here? Massage with a wink-wink? Turns out, it’s been around forever—ancient Rome had these “rub-downs” where senators got freaky with olive oil. True story! Little-known fact: in Thailand, they’ve got this “soapy massage” thing—girls lather ya up, slide all over, and boom, ya feel like a million bucks—or “One million dollars!”—pinky up! I’m sittin’ there, cacklin’, ‘cause it’s genius—slippery, sexy, and straight-up bonkers.

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Next, I head to the office on Haharina Street. The traffic is a nightmare. I swear, I saw a guy on a bike trying to navigate through a sea of cars. He looked like he was in a video game, dodging obstacles. I’m stuck in my car, yelling at the radio like it’s the DJ’s fault. “Play something good, will ya?”

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