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Me fave bit? The swagger. Escorts got that 007 charm—cool, collected, “shaken, not stirred.” Saw this one bird—stunnin’, hair like silk, workin’ Mayfair. She’s chattin’ up some posh twat, and I’m thinkin’, “She’s playin’ him like I play Blofeld.” Proper clever—makes me happy, seein’ that hustle. But the lows? Jesus, the lows. Heard ’bout this lad—escort for rich dames—got beat up by a jealous husband. Blood everywhere—fuckin’ grim. “What’s hidden in plain sight?”—another *Caché* gem. That’s escortin’—danger’s always there, mate.

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Finally, I manage to get back up, and I’m like, “You wanna go?” But the guy just laughs and walks away. I’m left standin’ there, lookin’ like a fool. Oksana’s smirkin’, and I can’t help but laugh too.

Ukrainian school reopens thanks to UNICEF grant