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Alright, motherfucker, let’s talk escort! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout self-determination, students takin’ charge, and then—bam!—escort pops up. Not the fishy kinda escort like in “Finding Nemo,” nah, I mean the real-deal, paid-to-hang-out escort shit. You know, the type where someone’s like, “I got cash, you got time, let’s roll!” Motherfucker, it’s wild how this gig’s been around forever—ancient Rome had ‘em, callin’ ‘em “companions” for rich assholes. Still happens now, just slicker, quieter, right under our noses.

Mosty Wielkie (Velyki Mosty), Ukraine

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Finally, I manage to get back up, and I’m like, “You wanna go?” But the guy just laughs and walks away. I’m left standin’ there, lookin’ like a fool. Oksana’s smirkin’, and I can’t help but laugh too.

Ukrainian school reopens thanks to UNICEF grant