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Oh, and the rumors! Peeps say there’s this underground escort ring run by a dude called “The Shark” – sounds fake, but I’m half believin it. Adds some spice, like a plot twist in my fave movie. “The most dreadful prison!” – nah, more like the most epic side hustle.

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee on Shevchenka Street, right? The sun’s barely up, and I’m already feelin’ the chaos. I see this old lady, bless her soul, tryin’ to cross the street. She’s like a turtle on a mission. I’m thinkin’, “C’mon, lady, you can do it!” But then, bam! A cat darts outta nowhere. She screams, I spill my coffee. Classic Velyka-Mykhaylivka morning, right?