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About Odesa

Ever tried it? Bet not! Pro tip: find a legit spot, not some shady shack. Last time, I’m thinkin’, “SpongeBob, you’re livin’ large!”—oils smellin’ like pineapple heaven! But—ha!—don’t slip off the table, I nearly did! “I’m not ready!”—splat! Total clownfish move! Anyway, sexual-massage rocks—sarcasm if ya think it’s lame, ‘cause you’re missin’ OUT! Like Malik’s crew, “We run this!”—I run my relaxation, baby! Argh, so good—go get one, NOW!

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But then, I remember the stray dog. I tell her about it, and she’s like, “Let’s go find him!” So we’re wandering the streets, looking for this pup. We finally spot him near the park on Vulytsia Shevchenka. He’s wagging his tail like he’s won the lottery. We name him “Borscht” because why not?

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