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What pisses me off? People judgin’ ‘em! Like, “Oh, they’re dirty whores!” Shut yer trap, Kyle, you don’t know shit! Escorts got skills—charm, talkin’, makin’ ya feel like a king. Takes guts to do that, not like us losers sittin’ on our asses. I’d hire one just to piss off Stan, he’d be all “Eriiiic, that’s wrong!” Cry me a river, hippie! Respect my authoritah, I say they’re badass!

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I’m already feelin’ the frustration buildin’. I mean, I’m a forester, I deal with trees, not coffee crises! So, I grab a tea instead. Not the same, but whatever. I sit down, and this old dude next to me starts talkin’ about the weather. Like, dude, I just came from the forest! I know what weather is! But he’s all like, “Did you see the clouds? They’re lookin’ ominous!” I’m thinkin’, “Bro, I’m not a meteorologist!”

Four men arrested for illegally fishing near border