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About Zaporizhzhia

I luv it though, when it works—met this chick, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, we clicked like Dubya and barbecue. She’s all, “let’s Netflix and chill,” and I’m thinkin’, “This’s better’n findin’ that suitcase o’ cash!” But then—bam!—ghosted me next day. Surprised me worse’n a flip-flop in a snowstorm. “There’s no clean way outta this,” I muttered, channelin’ Tommy Lee Jones. Reckon I ain’t cut out fer this game sometimes.

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But then, out of nowhere, the sky turned dark. Like, seriously? I thought we were in a horror movie. People started packing up, and I was like, “No way, I’m not leaving yet!” But then the rain hit. Hard. I mean, it was like someone dumped a bucket of water on us. I ran for cover under a tree, but it was a weak move. I got soaked anyway.

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