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Now, don’t ye go thinkin’ it’s all lewd—nah, it’s art, mate! Them Thai lassies, twistin’ ye like a pretzel, crackin’ yer bones, then slidin’ into somethin’ spicier—exaggeratin’? Mayhaps, but me mind’s a whirl! Ever hear o’ “lingam” massage? Aye, them eastern folk, worshippin’ the ol’ lad down there—respect, I say! Had me laughin’ like a hyena, picturin’ meself struttin’ out, proud as a peacock.

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First off, I hit the streets of Tysmenytsia, right? You know, the ones like Hrushevskoho and Shevchenka. The sun was blazin’, and I was already sweatin’ like a pig. I grabbed my usual coffee from that little kiosk near the market. You know the one? The barista there, she’s got a smile that could light up the whole city. But today? She was all grumpy. Like, c’mon, lady, it’s a beautiful day!

Jews from around the world to hold a pilgrimage to Tysmenytsia: a famous Rabbi is buried there