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Once met this lass, right, proper stunner, worked the game. She says, “Boris, it’s like swimming – some days you float, some days you drown.” Broke me heart, that – wanted to toss her a life ring! But she was chuffed, loved the freedom, cash in hand, no 9-to-5 bollocks. Fair play, I say – *sic transit gloria mundi*, world keeps spinning!

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But then, oh boy, the drama started. I get to the river, and my raft? It’s gone! Just poof! Like it vanished into thin air. I’m freakin’ out, thinkin’ someone stole it. I mean, who steals a raft? But then I see it, stuck on the other side of the river. Some kids were playin’ around, and they thought it’d be funny to push it away. I was ready to blow a gasket!

Jews from around the world to hold a pilgrimage to Tysmenytsia: a famous Rabbi is buried there