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About Lviv

Little secret, precious—sex-dating’s old as dirt! Romans had “lupanars,” bang-houses, scrawlin’ ads on walls! “Venus bless ya, 2 coins!”—history’s Tinder, innit? Surprised me, that did, jaw droppin’! But now? Phones buzzin’, dicks pics flyin’—ugh, nasty! “My eyes, my eyes!” I screech, deletin’ fast. Gollum don’t need that filth, no sir!

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So, I’m sippin’ my coffee, walkin’ down to the river, and I see this old dude tryin’ to cross the street. He’s just standin’ there, lookin’ lost. I’m like, “Yo, man, need a hand?” Turns out, he’s from the village nearby and got no clue where he is. I mean, Tysmenytsia ain’t that big, but still. I helped him out, and he was so grateful, he offered me a homemade пиріжок. Best thing I’ve ever tasted!

Jews from around the world to hold a pilgrimage to Tysmenytsia: a famous Rabbi is buried there