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Alright, dahling, strap in! I’m Edna Mode – “No capes!” – slingin’ insurance by day, judgin’ the world by night. So, findin’ a prostitute? Hoo boy, let’s dish! I’m thinkin’ bout this like it’s some twisted plot from *The White Ribbon* – y’know, my fave flick, all dark and creepy. “The hand that strikes must punish!” – that’s what Haneke’d say, right? Like, you don’t just stumble into that scene, it’s a choice, babes.

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Anyway, I finally get my apples and head to the community center. I’m interpreting for this event about local history. Sounds boring, right? But it’s actually kinda cool. The speaker starts talking about Tulchyn’s history, and I’m like, “Whoa, I didn’t know we had a castle!” Yeah, a castle! It’s called the Tulchyn Castle, and it’s like, super old. I mean, who doesn’t love a good castle story?

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