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So, sexual-massage—it’s like, part relaxin’, part “woo-hoo!” Ya get these slick hands slidin’ everywhere, and I’m like, “Marge, why ain’t we tried this?!” Little known fact—ancient Greeks were all over this! Called it “anatripsis”—fancy, huh? They’d rub dudes down before battles—talk about a happy ending before the fight! D’oh! Imagine Achilles gettin’ a sexy rubdown—prolly why he was so pissed when his heel got tagged.

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Finally, we get the fire under control. The factory’s a mess, but at least we saved the day. And the cat. I hand it to some lady who’s crying like it’s a soap opera. I’m just glad I didn’t get scratched up too bad.

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