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So, ya wanna try it? Do it! Sexual-massage ain’t just foreplay—it’s da main event sometimes! Sarcasm aside—people think it’s all naughty, but nah, it’s art, ya? Heals ya, pumps ya up—hell, I’d get one daily if I could. Little quirk of mine—I’d prolly grunt like in *Terminator* while it’s happenin’, ha! Wot’s yer take, huh? Ya gotta feel dat fire—don’t be a wimp bout it! “I’ll be back” for more, dat’s for damn sure!

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So, we decide to grab some lunch at this spot on Lvivska Street. The food’s bomb, but the service? Not so much. We waited like an eternity. I swear, I could’ve grown a beard in that time. Finally, our food arrives, and it’s cold. I’m like, “Dude, did you just take a nap with my burger?” Oleg’s cracking up, and I’m just trying to keep my cool.

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