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Pro tip: watch out for sketchy joints. Heard this story—guy goes in, thinks he’s gettin’ a sexy rubdown, ends up with some hairy dude named Carl crushin’ his spine! D’oh! Total buzzkill! Stick to the legit spots—ask ‘round, don’t be a dope like me! So yeah, sexual-massage—wild, sloppy, freakin’ awesome. Makes ya feel alive, ya know? Just don’t overthink it—or ya might miss the whole damn point!

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After that, I decided to check out the local market on Haharina Street. It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh veggies, fruits, and the smell of homemade borscht wafting through the air. I’m drooling just thinking about it. But then, I see this lady arguing with a vendor over the price of cabbage. Like, seriously? It’s cabbage!