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Downside? Costs a bomb sometimes. Fifty quid for an hour? Robbery! Still, worth it when they hit that sweet spot—neck, shoulders, oof. Ever tried it with a mate? Awkward at first, then you’re both cacklin— “Survival is victory,” as the film says, and we bloody survived the giggles. So, yeah, erotic-massage—bit of a laugh, bit of a thrill, all nature’s dance. Go on, give it a whirl—don’t tell the missus I said that!

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I mean, come on! A cow? In the middle of the city? Only in Starokostyantyniv, right? So, I rush over there, and sure enough, there’s this massive cow just chillin’ in the middle of the street, mooing like it owns the place. Cars are honking, people are laughing, and I’m just standing there, shaking my head.

Russia tried to wipe out a Ukrainian air base that's crucial to its ability to launch the Storm Shadow missile