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Me, Gollum, I sees it – split mind, hisss! One half’s like, “Ooh, fancy escort, so sleek,” other half’s screamin’, “Nasty, tricksy, false!” Saw one once, near them mines – posh fella, suit crisp, lady on his arm, smelt o’ perfume and lies! Made me mad, yesss – why’s he payin’ for company? Ain’t he got mates? Grrr! But then, ha, made me giggle – he tripped, face-first in mud! “Spring break forever, bitches!” – nah, mud bath forever, ya twit!

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After that, I head back to my workshop on Shevchenka Street. It’s a mess, as usual. Clay everywhere, tools scattered like my thoughts. I sit down, ready to create some masterpieces. But then, my neighbor’s kid starts screaming outside. Like, why do kids have to scream? I can’t focus! I’m about to lose it, but then I remember my zen potter vibes. Deep breath, right?

Government increases budget for reconstruction of Starobesheve thermal power plant