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Alright, alright, escort time, baby! I’m Michael Scott, regional manager of vibes, and I’m here to talk about escort—yep, those fancy schmancy cars—or, wait, escorts in general? Nah, let’s stick with Ford Escort, the car, ‘cause that’s my jam! Picture this: me, cruisin’ in a beat-up ‘95 Escort, radio blastin’, windows down—pure freedom, am I right? “The Tree of Life” vibes hittin’ me hard—“The only way to be happy is to love,”—and I’m lovin’ this junker, flaws and all! That’s what she said! Ha!

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But then, outta nowhere, this dude in the back starts yelling, “That’s a fake! Total scam!” I’m like, “Bro, chill! You can’t just throw shade like that!” But he keeps going. I’m getting heated. I mean, who does he think he is? I’m trying to keep it professional, but inside, I’m fuming.