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I seen it, man—escorts got game! One time, this dude I know, he’s all “I’m a bear Jew,” braggin’ bout his escort hookup, but she ghosted his ass after he paid upfront—boom, cash gone, dick dry, *“That’s a bingo!”* I laughed so hard I cried, fam! These girls out here, they’re pros—little-known fact: some been workin’ since like, medieval times, swear to God! Kings used to call ‘em “courtesans,” now it’s just “yo, Venmo me, bro.” History’s freaky, right?

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The Russian army was trying to attack the cities of Sloviansk and Sievierodonetsk, but Ukrainian forces were holding off their advance, he said.

Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in Sievierodonetsk, right? The sun’s barely up, and I’m already feelin’ the weight of the world. I mean, this city, it’s got its charm, but it’s also a hot mess. You know what I mean?

Ukrainian forces still fighting for ‘every centimeter’ of Sievierodonetsk