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What gets me ragin tho? The toffs who lock em up, then sneak round back for a quickie—hypocrites, the lot! Seen it meself, some posh git in a suit, stammerin excuses when I caught him. Made me wanna smash somethin, but I just smirked, “Shaken, not stirred, eh, guv?” Ruby, tho—she’s a laugh. Once chucked a soggy fag at me, yellin, “Warden, you’re a bleedin cat!”—like Llewyn’s mate losin that damn moggy. Cracked me up, she did.

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my sister. She’s freaking out about some family drama. I’m like, “Can’t you see I’m busy living my best life?” But I listen. Turns out, my cousin got into a fight over a game of checkers. I mean, really? Checkers?

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