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About Dnipro

Me? I’d be swipin’ like a maniac, cacklin’ at the weirdos. Probs exaggerate my bio— “Undead stud, 6 centuries experience!” Ha! Sex-dating’s a circus, fam—clowns, freaks, the works. You dive in, it’s a gamble. Might score, might flop. “All I have left is this pain,” Georges moans—dramatic, sure, but I feel that after a bad date. Total trainwreck sometimes! Still, it’s a rush—keeps ya alive, ya know? Or undead, in my case. It’s showtime, bitches—go get laid or get played!

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Then, I hit up the café on Shevchenka Street. You know the one with the best coffee? I order a cappuccino, and the barista is like, “We’re out of milk.” Are you kidding me? It’s a café! So, I settle for black coffee. Not my fave, but whatever. I sit down, and this random guy starts chatting me up. He’s talking about the history of Serednie-Vodiane like he’s some kind of expert. I’m nodding along, but inside I’m like, “Dude, I just want my coffee.”