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So, I tried it once—yep, ya heard me! Old Bernie, creaky joints and all, walked into this dimly lit joint—smelled like lavender and rebellion. Lady’s hands were magic, I swear! Felt like she was pullin’ stress right outta my bones. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect to feel 20 again! “Boyhood” moment—kinda like when Mason’s mom says, “I thought there’d be more.” I get it, lady—life’s short, grab the good stuff!

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By the time I wrap up with him, I’m exhausted. I head back to my car, and guess what? I locked my keys inside. Classic move, right? I’m standing there, cursing under my breath, when this nice guy walks by. He’s like, “Need help?” I’m like, “Yeah, if you can magically unlock my car.” He laughs and pulls out a slim jim. I’m thinking, “This guy’s a wizard!”

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