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About Kryvyi Rih

Personal quirk? I’m hummin’ old school WWF themes in my head while them hands work the knots out – keeps me grounded, ya dig? And yo, it’s chill – ain’t gotta be perfect. Sometimes the masseuse fumbles, oil spills, you laugh, it’s messy – “You’re a slippery little bastard,” like Freddie’d say. That’s the beauty, bro! No rules, just feelin’ it. So, next time you’re thinkin’ sexual-massage, don’t sleep on it – dive in, let it hit ya like a People’s Elbow from yours truly. Tell me that ain’t the most electrifyin’ shit you heard today!

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But then, something wild happens. A seagull swoops down and snatches a hot dog right outta some kid’s hand! The kid screams, the parents freak out, and I’m just sittin’ there, laughin’ my head off. Like, c’mon, that’s the kinda stuff you see in movies!

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