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Oh, and here’s a hoot—some escort told me she keeps baby wipes in her purse, calls ‘em her “client reset kit.” Laughed my dang head off! Sarcasm drippin’, I said, “Girl, you’re a genius!” She just winked—prolly made more that night than I do in a month. How’s that workin’ for ya, Dr. Phil? Not great, y’all, not great. I’m jealous as a cat with no whiskers!

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Just when I think it’s smooth sailing, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my big moment? We all have to evacuate. I’m standing outside on Haharina, watching the fire trucks zoom by. I’m thinking, “This is not how I pictured my day.”

Russia-Ukraine war: List of key events, day 847