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Now, here’s what gets me mad—the Escort got no respect! People call it basic, boring—screw that! It wasn’t boring, it was honest! Not like these overpriced SUVs cloggin’ the roads today—billionaires should not exist, and neither should their gas-guzzlin’ monstrosities! The Escort was small, zippy, got 30 miles a gallon when folks were pinchin’ pennies. Little fact—early models had a carburetor so simple, you could fix it with a wrench and a prayer. Try that with your fancy electric crap!

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Then, I bump into an old friend from school. We start chatting, and he’s telling me about his new job at the Rivne Nuclear Power Plant. I’m like, “Wow, that’s cool but also kinda scary.” I mean, nuclear power? Yikes! But he’s super chill about it. “Just don’t touch anything,” he says. Thanks for the tip, man!

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