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Yo, so I’m a Program Director, right? Talkin’ bout escort - not the car, nah, the gig. People payin’ for company, wild shit. My fave flick’s “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind,” so ima weave that in, fam. Picture this: dude hires an escort, they vibe, then he’s like, “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!” Straight up quotin’ that movie, tryna erase her from his brain later. Messed up, right? I’m sittin here, thinkin, escort life’s absurd - you’re a temp soulmate for cash. Deadpan as fuck, I’m like, “Yo, she’s clockin’ in for cuddles.”

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So, I wipe it off and head to the café on Lvivska. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual – a double espresso. The barista, this cool dude named Oleg, gives me a nod. He knows my order. We’re basically besties now. But then, the power goes out. Just like that. No coffee, no lights. I’m like, “What’s next? A zombie apocalypse?”

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