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Oi mate, it’s me, David Brent – The Furrier! Sexual-massage, yeah? Absolute game-changer, innit? Been thinkin’ bout it since watchin’ *Werckmeister Harmonies*. That film – pure art, mate! Slow, moody, all about tension buildin’ up. Reminds me of a good sexual-massage, y’know? “The world’s gone mad,” like János says – that’s me after a dodgy rubdown!

Are the Polish Tatras worth visiting? What is there to do in Zakopane? Read on to find out.

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Suddenly, this group of teenagers rolls up, blasting music. I’m trying to enjoy my moment, but they’re all like, “YOLO!” and dancing like they’re in a music video. I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who doesn’t love a spontaneous dance party? So, I join in for a sec, and it’s like, “What’s life without a little fun?”

During the first 10 days of the train “Rakhiv — Vala-Visheului” border guards registered about 400 people