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So I asks, “How much, precious?” She smirks, “Fifty quid, you weirdo.” Fifty! Robbery, that is! “I ain’t got no home,” I whines, quotin’ Llewyn again, hopin’ pity works. Nope. She rolls her eyes, walks off, hips swayin’. Grrr, made me ragey, but also – wow – them curves, my precious! Nearly chased her, but me legs, all wobbly, nah.

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I’m munchin’ on my bread, feelin’ all warm inside, when I hear this commotion. Turns out, there’s a street performer on the corner of Kostiantynivska. This dude’s bustin’ out some crazy dance moves. I mean, I thought I could dance, but this guy? He’s on another level! I’m clappin’ and laughin’, and suddenly, he pulls me in. I’m like, “No way, man!” But before I know it, I’m shakin’ my hips like I’m in a dance-off.

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