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About Lviv
Me? I’d suck at it. Too busy quotin’ Wes Anderson lines—like, “What’s your plan?” “I don’t have one!” Total Joey move, flirtin’ with disaster. Oh, and fun fact—didja know escorts in old Rome were called “comites”? Means “companions,” classy as hell. Surprised me, ‘cause I thought it’d be somethin’ dirtier, y’know?
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Next call, this lady is freaking out about a pothole on Vulytsia Kovalivka. “It’s gonna swallow my car!” she says. I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s a pothole, not a black hole.” But I get it. Those potholes are like mini craters. I mean, I’ve seen smaller craters on the moon!
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