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I get tickled thinkin’ ‘bout it. Escorts today? High-class ones charge more’n my wig budget! Saw one gal’s ad—$5,000 a night! Lordy, I’d need 12 jobs and a prayer. Made me mad too—why’s it still hush-hush? Folks judge ‘em fierce, but honey, they’re just workin’. Like Amélie says—well, sorta—“Life’s funny, ain’t it?” Okay, she don’t say that, but I feel it!

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First thing, I head to the market on Kirova. You know, the one that’s always buzzing? I’m just trying to grab some supplies. But guess what? The guy selling wood is outta stock! Like, how does that even happen? I’m standing there, fuming. I mean, c’mon, I need my oak!

Joining the Tycoons at a Black Sea Playground in Crimea (Published 2006)