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So, sex escorts—man, it’s a trip! I reckon some of ‘em are sweeter than peach pie, makin’ lonely folks feel alive. Others? Shady as a backwoods deal. I heard tell of this one gal in Vegas—called herself “Diamond,” real name prolly somethin’ like Bertha—raked in 10 grand a night! Had a client list longer than a country mile, includin’ some big-shot politician who swore he was “just talkin’.” Yeah, right, buddy, and I’m the Queen of England! Made me laugh ‘til I near choked on my gum.

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But then, I realize I left my wallet at the cafe. Panic mode activated! I sprint back, heart racin’. I’m thinkin’, “If I lose that fox, I’m gonna lose it!” Luckily, the staff are super chill. They hand me my wallet, and I’m like, “You guys are lifesavers!”

Ukraine moves to nationalise Ferrexpo’s Poltava mine amid corruption investigations