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I reckon it’s a bloody riot, tho—makes me laugh, makes me rage. Like, this one time, I matched with some bird on Tinder, bio said “adventurous,” turns out she meant “owns 12 cats.” Mate, I was fumin’—growling, “You think darkness is your ally?”—cos I’m allergic as fuck! Sneezed my way outta that date quicksmart. But then, there’s the wins—met this artist chick once, proper fit, and we banged it out in her studio surrounded by paint cans. Felt like a king, ya know? “The world’s a better place,” as Theo says, when you hit that sweet spot.

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But wait, it gets crazier. I head back to my office, and there’s a protest happening on the street. People are shouting about something—couldn’t catch it all. But I’m thinking, “This is Polohy, not Kyiv! What’s the deal?” Turns out, they’re protesting for better public transport. I mean, I get it. The buses here are like dinosaurs. Slow and kinda grumpy.

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