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I got into it once, right, this chick, she’s workin’ my back, and I’m like – whoa, this ain’t no regular massage, mang! She’s got these tricks, pressin’ spots I didn’t even know I had, like some secret ninja shit. Little known fact, amigo – them ancient Chinese cats? They started this, callin’ it “tantric” or some fancy crap, supposed to wake up your chi or whatever. Fuckin’ wild, right? Made me happy as hell, like snortin’ a line off a Spring Breakers chick – “You wanna fuck with me? Okay!”

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, still half-asleep, and I hear this loud honkin’ outside. I peek out my window on Shevchenka Street, and there’s this dude in a beat-up Lada, yellin’ at some poor guy tryin’ to park. Classic Piskivka, right? I mean, who needs a parking spot when you can just block the whole street? 😂

Russian terrorists launched an air strike on a village in Kyiv region. A 20-year-old girl died