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Now, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *Carol*—you know, that Todd Haynes gem from 2015? Classy, slow-burn love stuff, all wrapped in fur coats and longing looks. And erotic-massage? Shoot, it’s got that same kinda tension! Like when Carol says, “I’m no good to anyone,” but then them hands start movin’, and suddenly—bam!—you’re good to SOMEBODY, honey! Ain’t that a trip?

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We head over to check it out. The machine’s a beast! I’m talkin’ rusty, but with potential. I can already see it in my mind, all polished and shiny. But then, bam! The owner of the junkyard, this grumpy old dude, starts yellin’ at us. “Get off my property!” he screams. Like, chill, man! We’re just lookin’!

What are you doing here? Or why seemingly amazing coincidences aren't so unlikely after all