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I dig it, though, the hustle. Reminds me of Heath Ledger’s “I’m an agent of chaos”—these girls, they flip the script. One time, my buddy Paulie, he hires this escort, right? Swears she’s a college kid, next day she’s on the news—some politician’s daughter! I’m like, “Holy shit, Paulie, you banged a headline!” He’s sweatin’, I’m dyin’ laughin’.

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After all that chaos, we hit up a bar on Komsomolskaya Street. Needed a drink, like, yesterday. We order some local brews, and I’m feelin’ like a champ. The bartender’s a character, too. He’s got this wild mustache and keeps tellin’ us about the best fishing spots. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not here to fish!” But I can’t help but laugh.

Viterra upgrades its oilseeds processing plant in eastern Ukraine