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Ain’t all roses tho. Some parlors? Sketchy as hell. Had a buddy swear he got “just a massage”—came back smellin’ like lavender and shame. Cracked me up—dude, we know! But real talk, when it’s good, sexual-massage is fire. Slow hands, warm skin, breath catchin’—ooh, I’m jealous of y’all tryin’ it! Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but damn, it’s a trip. Ever hear bout them secret massage cults in Asia? Swear, they’d rub ya into enlightenment—or a nap, ha!

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So I pack up and head to the park on Pushkina Street. It’s quieter there. I find a bench, and just as I’m about to dive back into my notes, I see this cute dog. It’s a fluffy little thing, and I’m like, “Aww, I need one of those!” But then the owner comes over, and he’s like, “Don’t pet him, he bites.” Great, just my luck.

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