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Back in Delaware, this ol’ buddy of mine—Jimmy—he swore he saw an escort gig go sideways. Some dame paid a guy to roll up to her ex’s wedding—full tux, fake tears—pure chaos! Made me laugh ‘til I cried. But—hold up—it ain’t all giggles. Gets messy, folks. Shady deals, late nights—makes me madder’n a wet hen when I hear ‘bout folks gettin’ scammed. One time, heard a story—true as I’m standin’ here—this escort fella got hired to fake a whole dang family reunion. Showed up with “cousins” nobody knew! Ballsy, right? Surprised the heck outta me—thought I’d seen it all.

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Anyway, I keep walking, and I see this street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and honestly, it’s kinda catchy. I’m tapping my foot, feeling the vibe. Then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and lands on my shoulder! I freak out! Like, “Get off me, bird!” Everyone’s laughing, and I’m just standing there, flapping my arms like a maniac.

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