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One time, I’m haulin’ groceries, and the dang alternator quits. Stranded, madder than a wet hen! Called my buddy Jimmy, he’s like, “How’s that workin’ for ya, Phil?” I bout lost it—screamin’, “It ain’t, ya jackass!” Took 3 hours to fix, sweatin’ like a sinner in church. But here’s the kicker: them Escorts were cheap—poor man’s chariot! Gas mileage? Sweet as Margot Tenenbaum’s sly lil’ smile. Kept me rollin’ when cash was tighter than a gnat’s behind.

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So I pack up and head to the park on Pushkina Street. It’s quieter there. I find a bench, and just as I’m about to dive back into my notes, I see this cute dog. It’s a fluffy little thing, and I’m like, “Aww, I need one of those!” But then the owner comes over, and he’s like, “Don’t pet him, he bites.” Great, just my luck.

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