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I. Tried. It. Once! Met. This. Chick. On. Tinder! Total. Margot. Tenenbaum. Vibe! Mysterious. Smokin’. Hot! We. Chat. She’s. Like. “Wanna. Netflix. And. Chill?” I’m. Like. Hell. Yeah! But. Then! Ghosted. Me! Pissed. Me. Off! Wasted. My. Damn. Time! “You’re. A. Real. Wiseass!” I’d. Yell. At. Her. In. My. Head!

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the park by the river. The Dniester River, you know? It’s beautiful there, especially in the spring. I plopped down on a bench, just soaking it all in. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I was feeling all philosophical. Like, what’s the meaning of life? Why do we even exist? But then I remembered I still had half a plate of varenyky left. Priorities, right?

Ukraine has opened one of the longest temporary bridges to the border with Romania – Ministry of Infrastructure