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So, check it—massage been around forever. Ancient Greeks? Rubbin’ down athletes, oiled up, half-naked—prolly got frisky too, who knows! Then there’s this Thai style, “nuad boran,” means ancient touch—sounds classy, but it’s steamy as hell. Hands slidin’, bodies twistin’, tension just—poof! Gone! I’m like, damn, humans, you sneaky geniuses! Saw this X post once, dude swore Cleopatra invented erotic-massage with rose oil—bullshit, but I’d buy it, sounds dope.

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Then, boom! The door swings open, and in walks this group of young folks. They’re loud, full of energy, and I can’t help but smile. They’re all about that party life, and I’m here for it. They start ordering cocktails like they’re at some fancy bar in Kyiv. I whip up a few mojitos, and they’re loving it. I mean, who doesn’t love a good mojito, right?

Russian-installed authorities urge evacuation of Kherson ahead of expected Ukrainian advance