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Once hooked up with this chick—total firecracker. Met at a dive bar, she’s quotin’ Bowie, I’m thinkin’, “This is my kinda crazy.” We’re vibin’, it’s all “You’re not a groupie, you’re a Band-Aid,” *Almost Famous* style. Night ends in her flat—mind blown, sheets wrecked. Next mornin’, she’s gone, left a note: “Thanks, trickster.” I laughed my ass off—out-Loki’d by a mortal! Still, made me happy—rare win in this game.

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Then, boom! I step outside, and it’s like the universe decided to throw a curveball. I see this massive crowd on Komsomolskaya Street. I’m thinking, “What’s the fuss?” Turns out, some dude’s trying to set a record for the longest jump on a pogo stick. Like, seriously? Who even thinks of that? But hey, I’m all for entertainment, so I stick around.

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