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I tried it once—don’t tell Marge, she’d freak. This chick—pro masseuse, swear!—started with my shoulders, then bam, lower, and I’m like, “Whoa, that’s new!” Felt like a freakin’ king, all relaxed but also—uh—awake, ya know? “Mmm… donuts.”—shoulda brought snacks, ‘cause it’s intense, man. The oils smelled like flowers or some crap, made me sneeze, but damn, it was smooth. Little fact: they use ylang-ylang oil sometimes—supposed to make ya horny. Worked on me, oops!

Men, Women, Couples – Downtown Toronto

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But then, bam! I hit a pothole. My bike goes sideways, and I’m like, “Noooo!” I tumble off, and my hands are covered in dirt. Great, just great. Now I’m a dirty potter. I laugh it off, though. Gotta keep it light, right?

Ten civilians killed in Russian attacks on Ukraine, Kyiv reports progress in south